Clowning: My Healing Wish For A Girl With HIV

This poem was written for a 5 year old who had HIV Aids and she was blind. She was lying on the ground between two parents. I was at a small 40 bed HIV facility in Rayong, Thailand. I remember clowning with the patients inside the building, all were dying of HIV. I had my ribbon twirling and played tug-o-war with one lady whose arms and legs were like tooth picks, I always remember the twinkle in her eyes as I tugged on the ribbon. Her spirit was very much alive. I juggled and played with my whistle and had squeezy eggs that you can throw on the floor, they splat and then regroup. Really nice effect. Then I juggled out on the landing, and I noted people were not responding. I wondered why this was. It turned out they were blind. So I started to make noise. I then saw two parents sitting on the ground with the 5 year old daughter between them. She was just lying there. They must have been so sad. I came up and I had my whistle that goes up and down, high to low. You can make interesting noises with it as you pull the leaver like a trombone. Anyway I grabbed her little hand and had her hold it at one end. I blew the whistle and with my hand over hers we pulled the metal pipe down so she could hear the down sound and then up to hear the high pitch. When I did this she started to clap and I saw she was so excited. The first time she had heard the sound. I realised in that moment that she could see colour through the sound.

On leaving the HIV clinic I could only feel joy and upliftment rather than sorrow, for the moments we shared were so lovely and special for me. I loved connecting with these people, just creating a moment of life and laughter. Just live in the moment, rather than think of the future. I felt deeply happy for having been there. I was told many go into remission after a program of laughter, the positive intention does something to the immune system. We clowns know this, still waiting on the medical fraternity to see the merit in having humour and laughter in hospitals. Can you imagine how quickly they would heal. Patch Adams would be nodding in agreement to that point.

So this is for the little girl.

MY HEALING WISH

This is a tribute to your daughter,
For she is a bright light,
And happiness is the medicine,
Sunshine is the panacea,
For much merriment and clowning around
Is the atmosphere of peace,
In being the fool is the tool,
That brings healing to health.

May your daughters life be long and healthy,
May you share in your grandchildren,
May your family remain united,
For they are blessed with love,
And there is no greater wealth than this.

And all I can see is sunshine,
Even in sorrow,
For the spirit of god is a powerful force,
And it requires a trust in the process,
A faith that there is meaning,
Yet every life has a message,
Every life is important,
And may we extend the healing wish to all those unwell,
In hospital,
In war zones,
In sorrow,
For we can extend a hand to others in empathy,
For each is family,
In a world divided,
That is not balanced,
So the key is to find the balance,
And make fairness your measure,
Love your cup,
For I am sure it will overflow with goodness,
For there is much you have done for others.

Always remember that the end is not to be feared,
It is a natural process,
For which we all return home,
For our life is a magic moment that must not be taken for granted,
For the wish to be granted,
Was to be here.

So know that love is healing,
And be grateful for every moment,
Whether it be long or short,
For the real death is not living life to the fullest,
It is living in fear and anger,
And you are the most beautiful gift,
That must be shared,
Cared for,
For all to see,
I wish you a healthy life eternally.