What You Look Like Is Not Who You Are

This is for women who define their self worth through the eyes of men.  They are not the determiner of your value, YOU ARE.  I don’t know how many times men have smiled at me as I appear attractive but I have come to realise that objectivisation (being an object in their eyes) is really their detachment from their feeling side where they don’t see you as human.  They may play a game, refuse to speak, get off on looking at you, or see you as unequal.  That is the issue of those men, it says more about them than you.  I send respect to all men and for those who do feel a connectedness to women and look through the physical into the heart of a person, you will discover the true nature of love.   Love is really about loving yourself and then being open to love others.  It has nothing to do with looks, it is to see a person in-to-me-see is the real connection.

My experience is not a bitter one it has been illuminating.  I have come to love myself and keep my own counsel.  I would ask women to start to grow and be who they are, even if that means being alone.  I’ve been alone a long time and I have found it liberating.  I found the relationship with myself far more important than with a man.  However, if a good man came along I am open, but I am not needing him.  Betrayal of self is the highest betrayal and no-one can make you happy, only you can.  I am truly happy without all the things, people, events that people feel define true happiness.  I realised it is to thine own self be true, that true love and happiness arises.

I love Beyonce’s song “Pretty Hurts’